This past weekend marked the end of a chapter for my oldest daughter and her boyfriend. They met at Baker and have become quite the intentional couple. Her boyfriend is going back to Wales 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 for a notable career position as he was unable to acquire a job here due to the new restrictions placed on international students by the ‘US administration.’ I have to look at this as meant to be. It is a very good job that not many have a chance at. —-My daughter will be goi

I am in despair. I don’t want to be this way. Perhaps if I just got up from this couch and walked around I’d feel better. But I don’t feel like it. My body and mind are telling me to rest. Rest Darlene. Let it reside and don’t allow it to control you. We have all the power we need when we give Jesus our problems. He will be with us. We just need to allow Him to take over what worries us. The trouble is - pain is felt. Pain inside. Sadness. Hurt. Regret. Shame. Anger. I am not

I just love this. In my … past years - all too often others attempted to use my past against me … until I finally came to terms with it. It - being my past. And honestly, I wanted to beat people to the punch when they would tell me they were going to share who I was and what I did - using this tactic as a weapon against me. No way was I going to let that happen. If anyone was going to share details about me - it was going to be me. I figured, everything I did was no differe

The World is not your trashcan. Obviously, this Chick-fil-A customer doesn’t believe in the same values the franchise has if they can so boldly throw their lunch out the window at Lake Shawnee. There are plenty of trash cans all over the place here. In fact, if getting out of your car is too exerting for you - I’m gonna bet you could find a trashcan to pull up to without getting out of your car. I never understand how a person can take a large bag like this and just throw it

I want you to stay alive. That’s what I think when I hear of those who find they simply cannot go on. I don’t know who needs to hear this but I know someone does. I read about those who feel they can’t go on or … they chose not to and my heart breaks. I think about how they try to reach others and we don’t know the cues. We don’t try to get to know them. Today, while my girls went to their grams house, I loaded up Bentley and we went to visit the residents at the agency I wor

Prologue: Lots to read. But do you want to keep scaling past information to justify your silence? Or worse, to place your political belief over the fear of ridicule? Of losing friends? Business? If you speak the truth as Jesus did, then you won’t be chastised for it. As a friend once told me: if they don’t like what you’re serving they aren’t your people. I am glad some are no longer my ‘people’ because I don’t want those kind in my life berating me for sticking up for what’s

I wrote an entire blog last night and for some reason, it did not save. This is the 3rd time this has happened to me. When will I ever learn? As usual, I will use this as a learning experience, but furthermore, an opportunity to ask God if what I wrote needed to be changed. It sucks to have so many feelings and emotions because when you do, you want to get them out right away. Like NOW! Not like now, as in right now - but I mean this hypothetically. Last night I was writi

I posted only a summary of this blog the other day and decided to add it to my website with a bit of elaboration. This was my mantra the other day: I'm not gonna drink I'm not gonna drink Dang right! There is nothing in the house to drink I'm not going out I'm not going out Uh, Yeah. It's too dang cold! I won't go to store for alcohol I won't go to store for alcohol No, I won't. I am too dang lazy. Problem solved. I read something on social media abou

I'm not sure what is happening but I cannot decide if I am annoyed by it, grateful for it or just not ready to let go. Last weekend I did not want to drink. Highly unusual. I tried to have a drink while I was cleaning house and I suddenly got the 'blech' from it and tossed it. I resorted to coffee. Then on Sunday evening around 7 my daughter came home and I was so happy about it, I ran upstairs and grabbed a seltzer and began to drink it. I went to the grocery store and came

Sometimes, I actually think I look pretty; other times I feel like such a worn down ... human and look like it terribly. I dislike those times. I cannot put off writing about this any longer. It plagues me day and night. I have to write about it to renew my mind. *sigh * Not that my mind will be in complete remedial relief. It will not because we will always be surrounded by negativity and how we react to it is what can heal us. Although, even when I react to unkindliness

I am so effing sad, depressed, lonely and exhausted. Not physically exhausted but mentally and emotionally. Does this mean, when you see me tomorrow or whenever, I will look this way? No. I don't do that. It is called functional. When alone in a bedroom and all you can do is think and imagine saying things that you want to yell but you know where that got you in the past ... you let it dwell deep inside of you. As it is, when I write, I still wake up the next day and wonde

My puppy, Bentley. My little buddy. He does provide contentment to me. 💛 By the time you get to the end of this, you are probably thinking, dang, that girl needs a serious case of Jesus. I know that. But I cannot help it if I have big feelings and emotions. It is part of who I am and I would much rather have those feelings opposed to just ignoring situations or not caring what people think. It is one thing to care what others think of you, yet another to know when it matte

A Salvation Post - Being even more bold than the alcohol post. What’s gotten into me?! (Written Wednesday, September 17, 2025) I went to Bible study today because I really needed some Jesus and connection. It was wonderful. And I met some of the nicest women. I've actually been attending this study for a while. But started mid summer and of course sometimes life, illness and activities keep me from going but when i do get to attend - I am ever thankful, especially when I get

I was actually still sick this day but determined to get my butt outside and mow at least part of the pasture. I've been sick since last Thursday. Today is Monday. That is 5 days and I still do not feel the best. I think there might be only one person in this world who understands me and knows how much I despise being sick. He knows this of me because he knows I love my active days and energy. It is my previous business partner and friend, Chris. I think it is amazing how

Another new stage. The two older girls are gone and spending the weekend together- therefore it is just Clara and I. On Saturday, Clara...

I am my own worse and terrible critic. I cannot seem to be happy with myself. I feel like I don't do enough. When at the gym, I wish I...

I drove to work this morning with the music on repeat of two songs. Superheroes by The Script and It Don't Hurt Like It Used To by Billy Carrington. Both songs move my heart in ways, even I had no idea could happen. I think back to all these crummy days of laying in my bed - not ever sure which one ... from teen years? From the one where my first boyfriend and I lived in a house that was swarming with cockroaches? Or the house where we laid on a mattress on the floor that a

I told a friend who encouraged me to do more writing that I do my best writing when I am feeling depressed … or anxious. I found this...

My new plant stand with all my plants I am learning to take care of. The stand was actually a clothing hanger my middle daughter made. ...

I want to say something about this post that I saw a couple weeks ago. (In photos) I’ve tried to let it go from my mind as much as...